my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
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