I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
