Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
