craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
