pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
