Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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