I wanna passion pit in your ass
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
