drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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