Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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