Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
