sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
We are two peas in an std pod
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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