yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
