Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
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"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
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He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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