dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
