TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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