real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
My ATM looks so different sober.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I have already put on my inside pants.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
