Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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