This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
