you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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