You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
