she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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