Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
