Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
