She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
