It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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