this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
A bitchslap is in order.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
