is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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