the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize