Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
