There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
