I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
