Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
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