You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
