Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
