I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
