so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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