The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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