the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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