Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Randomize
