I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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