is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
