Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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