It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
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