My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
i think i just lost a toe
Randomize
