he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
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