Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
The struggles of a small town man whore
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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