How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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