What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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