How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
