please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize